Reflections of a Relaxed Woman (in the making)

“Growing up, I never knew a relaxed woman. Successful women? Yes. Productive women? Plenty. Anxious and afraid and apologetic women? Heaps of them. But relaxed women? At-ease women? Women who don't dissect their days into half hour slots of productivity? Women who prioritize rest and pleasure and play? Women who aren't afraid to take up space in the world? Women who give themselves unconditional permission to relax? Without guilt? Without apology? Without feeling like they need to earn it? I'm not sure I've ever met a woman like that. But I would like to become one.”

― Nicola Jane Hobbs

Returning from our Rejuvenating Roots Women’s Yoga & Ayurveda Retreat, I've been reflecting deeply on what it means to become a relaxed woman. Over four days, we immersed ourselves in nature, connected with horses, practiced yoga, engaged in rituals, savored wholesome Ayurvedic meals, laughed, crafted, and basked in each other's warm company.

We didn’t look at our calendars or scroll on our phones. 

We did not rush. 

We played. 

We turned our faces to the sun.

We rested.

One of my teachers says, “our experiences shape our nervous system.” To become a relaxed person, we must cultivate relaxing experiences. It sounds simple, but it is not easy. How many of us, in the busy-ness of our day to day lives, make time to prioritize rest and pleasure and play? How many of us feel like we have to earn it first?

That's the transformative power of a retreat. It's an intentional pause, a step away from the everyday, and an immersion into peace. It's an invitation to claim our right to rest.

It’s not about dissociating from life, it’s about connecting to what really matters. Because to show up fully in our lives, to contribute to our communities, and to advocate for peace, we must first find peace within ourselves. 

I believe each time we choose rest over stress we resist the propaganda that we are not enough — that we must be doing, producing, or consuming to be worthy. 

To rest is a rebellion. 

To slow down is a small act of resistance. 

To simply be is a revolution. 

Becoming a relaxed woman, and helping others relax is a big part of my purpose. When Jenny and I were designing this retreat, we thought of ourselves and all the women we love — women who are caregivers, women who are the glue that holds their communities/ families/ friends together. They are quick to take care of everyone else but when it comes to taking care of themselves, it is difficult to find the time. We wanted to give back to these women – to give them unconditional permission to relax and receive. 

It was beautiful to witness each other take deep sighs of release, giggle in conversation, take solo time to journal or lie back in a hammock, and savor nourishing meals. Like a fern slowly unfurling frond by frond, we discovered there were more and more layers to our relaxation. And as each day passed we settled deeper into a place of peace. 

Now, as I return to my daily routine, I notice myself giving from a place that is overflowing. I am nourished, connected to my purpose, and present. I think of our circle of women and wonder how they're moving through their week. I sense they're spreading the retreat's magic wherever they are now. 

An Invitation to Claim Your Peace

If this resonates with you, I warmly invite you to my upcoming Restore and Retreat: Lakeside Yoga Getaway, from July 18–21, 2025, in the serene town of Leland, Michigan. Hosted at the charming Riverside Inn, this four-day retreat offers daily yoga sessions, scenic hikes through Sleeping Bear Dunes, and leisurely afternoons on some of the world's most beautiful beaches. Savor delicious local cuisine and Michigan’s celebrated scenery as you connect with nature and loved ones. 

Perfect for solo travelers, couples and friends, this unforgettable getaway is an invitation to rediscover the joy of simply being. Whether you're seeking rejuvenation, connection, or a moment of peace, this getaway is designed to nourish your mind, body, and spirit.

Spaces are limited, and we would be honored to share this transformative experience with you. For more details and to reserve your spot, please visit:
👉 Restore and Retreat: Lakeside Yoga Getaway

Access Peace Wherever You Are

Whether or not you can attend a retreat in person, I created a gentle “Pocket Practice for Peace” just for you — a short, downloadable ritual to help you return to yourself in moments of overwhelm. Think of it as a retreat you can access — as part of your morning routine, on your lunch break, or even into bed.

🕊️Click here to download your free Pocket Practice for Peace.

Love and Yoga,
Kaytee

I Am Unsubscribing from the Myth of Earning Rest

“You were not just born to center your entire existence on work and labor. You were born to heal, to grow, to be of service to yourself and community, to practice, to experiment, to create, to have space, to dream, and to connect.”

― Tricia Hersey, Rest Is Resistance: A Manifesto

The belief that I had to earn my rest was so deeply ingrained in me that I didn’t even see it at first. It was like background noise — humming under every decision I made. 

I started to notice this pattern when I started working with my Yoga Therapist and mentor, Jenny Orona, to establish a daily practice. Her guidance was simple: wake up, brush my teeth, drink warm water, and meet myself on the mat. Practice. Meditate. Breathe.

But instead of dropping in, anxious thoughts would rush in like a storm.
"Am I going to have enough time to get ready for work?"
 "I should have packed my lunch last night."
 "Shit, I forgot to submit my group notes yesterday."
 "I have to do that first thing when I log on."

The meditation timer would ding, and I’d realize — I wasn’t really here.
I was everywhere else but here.

It took self-study, reflection, and Jenny’s patient guidance to realize, I was afraid of resting because if I stopped… there I was.Without the endless distractions of productivity, there was just me. Overfunctioning had become my shield — a way to stay too busy to feel. But eventually, the cost of living like that caught up to me. It wasn’t just unsustainable — it was soul-depleting.

It is a slow work in progress, but I am unsubscribing from the myth of earning rest. I am learning to slow down, nourish myself, and love myself for who I am not, not just what I can do. Because I am worthy of care simply for being alive.

My daily practice has been going strong for five years now. The anxious thoughts still try to knock sometimes, but now, they rarely take over. Mornings have become my sacred “me” time and I savor the time I get. I’m still learning how to extend that mindfulness beyond the morning — into the messy middle of my days, into the living and loving and breaking and becoming of it all. But that’s why I’m so passionate about sharing it. Because this work — this rest — is revolutionary.

In her book Rest Is Resistance, Tricia Hersey says:

“Loving ourselves and each other deepens our disruption of the dominant systems.
They want us unwell, fearful, exhausted, and without deep self-love because you are easier to manipulate when you are distracted by what is not real or true.”

Rest is a radical act of remembrance. It is the fertile soil where dreams, visions, and healing can take root. Yoga Nidra — often called “yogic sleep” — is a sacred portal into that rest. It’s a practice that invites the body into deep stillness while the mind floats between waking and dreaming in a state of “restful alertness”. Research shows that even short sessions of Yoga Nidra can lower cortisol levels and reduce stress, improve emotional regulation, boost creativity, and support healing from trauma.

But beyond the studies, here’s the truth I feel in my bones: Yoga Nidra reminds us that we are already whole. We do not have to earn our rest. We do not have to earn our existence.

So today, I offer you this practice to come home to yourself. Not because you need to fix anything. But because you deserve to remember who you really are — beneath all the noise.

Return to Rest — Transcript
As we settle into our Yoga Nidra meditation, we’ll begin by tensing and releasing different parts of the body, shifting our awareness into each area.

Starting with the toes, scrunch the toes in toward the soles of the feet. Feel a deep tension in the toes and the bottoms of the feet. Take a deep breath in — and as you exhale, release that tension. Let it go completely.

Now scrunch the toes, firm the legs, firm the glutes. Take another deep breath in.
Exhale — release the tension, feel the muscles soften.

Scrunch the toes again, brace the legs, firm the glutes and the abdomen. Inhale deeply.
Exhale — and release all that tension.

Bunch the toes, firm the legs, glutes, belly — now make fists with the hands — breathe in deeply.
Exhale — and let it all go.

And now, scrunch the entire body: toes, legs, glutes, belly, hands, arms, even scrunch the face.
Take a deep breath in — and a long exhale out — fully releasing.
Feel the tension melt away from your body, pooling into the mat like water.

Notice: is there anything you could do right now to become even one percent more comfortable?
If so, make any final adjustments.

You will remain lying down for our Yoga Nidra practice.
As you settle, allow your mind to clear.
Set an intention — a simple "I am" statement — such as:

  • I am rested and relaxed.

  • I am healing more and more each day.

  • I release my fears and worries.

Choose your intention, and repeat it silently three times to yourself.

Now we begin a rotation of consciousness.
Simply follow my voice as I guide your awareness from point to point in your body.
There is no need to move — simply listen and feel.

Bring your awareness to your mouth.
Become aware of your tongue, the lower jaw, the lower row of teeth, the upper row of teeth, the gums, upper lip, lower lip, and the space between the lips.

Right cheek... left cheek.
Right ear... left ear.

Forehead.
Right temple... left temple.
Top of the head.
Tip of the nose.
Right nostril... left nostril.
Right eyelid... left eyelid.
Right eye... left eye.
Right eyebrow... left eyebrow.
The space between the eyebrows.

Now move your awareness into the right hand:
Right thumb, second finger, third finger, fourth finger, fifth finger, palm of the hand, back of the hand, wrist, forearm, elbow, upper arm, shoulder, armpit, ribs, waist, hip, right thigh, knee, calf, ankle, heel, sole of the foot, top of the foot, right big toe, second toe, third toe, fourth toe, fifth toe.

Shift your awareness now to the left hand:
Left thumb, second finger, third finger, fourth finger, fifth finger, palm of the hand, back of the hand, wrist, forearm, elbow, upper arm, shoulder, armpit, ribs, waist, hip, left thigh, knee, calf, ankle, heel, sole of the foot, top of the foot, left big toe, second toe, third toe, fourth toe, fifth toe.

Now the right glute, the left glute.
Lower back, mid-back, upper back.
Right shoulder blade, left shoulder blade.
The back of the neck.
The back of the head.
Right ear, left ear, inner ears.
Roof of the mouth, throat, right collarbone, left collarbone.
Right side of the chest, left side of the chest, center of the sternum.
Upper abdomen, lower abdomen, navel, whole spine, whole head.

Now become aware of the major parts of the body:

  • The whole right arm.

  • The whole left arm.

  • Both arms together.

  • The whole right leg.

  • The whole left leg.

  • Both legs together.

  • The entire front of the body.

  • The entire back of the body.

  • The whole right side of the body.

  • The whole left side of the body.

  • The entire body together.

  • The whole body, radiant with awareness and sensation.

Now shift your awareness to your breath.
Without altering it, simply observe it.
Visualize your breath as a golden light, flowing along your spinal column.

With each inhale, the golden light flows in through the nose, down toward the tailbone.
With each exhale, it flows from the tailbone upward and out through the throat and nose — a cosmic tide of golden breath.
Stay with this golden, vibrant breath.

Now allow your breath to return to its natural rhythm.
Shift your awareness to the sensation of heat:

  • Feel the right leg becoming warm.

  • The left leg becoming warm.

  • The right arm, the left arm, the torso — all becoming warm.

  • The whole body, warm and glowing.

Now, all at once, feel the body become cool:

  • Legs cool.

  • Arms cool.

  • Torso cool.

  • The entire body, cool.

Release this sensation.

Now we move into imagery.
Clear the movie screen of your mind, and project these images:

Imagine you are standing outside in nature.
Feel your bare feet against the earth.
You are standing in a vast open meadow, surrounded by a lush forest.
You tip your face upward to feel the warm kiss of sunlight.
You can smell the scent of wildflowers in the air.

In the distance, you see a path leading into the forest.
You walk toward it and step inside.
The forest is shaded and cool.
The path winds gently uphill.
Sunlight filters through the trees.
Birdsong echoes softly around you.

As you ascend, you find a small opening in the hillside — a cave.
You are drawn to the cave and step inside.

Within the cave, you find a single candle glowing.
You realize this is a sacred temple.

You sit down upon the earth, and a deep sense of calm washes over you.
You feel at peace with all that is, needing nothing from the outside world.

You gaze into the candle flame.
Within the center of the flame, you see a tiny golden seed.
On the surface of the seed, your intention — your sankalpa — is inscribed.

Silently, internally, repeat your sankalpa three times with feeling and meaning.

Now notice: the seed is no longer within the flame.
It has been planted within your heart.

Again, silently repeat your intention three times.
Feel it taking root within you.

Our Yoga Nidra practice is now complete.

Slowly begin to guide your awareness back to your physical body.
Feel your breath, gently rising and falling.
Without opening your eyes just yet, notice the earth beneath you... the sky above you.
Allow your breath to deepen.

When you feel ready, you might stretch your arms overhead, stretch your legs long, take a full body stretch or a yawn.
You might hug your knees into your chest.
Eventually, roll onto your favorite side, curling into a fetal position, letting your head be cradled by your arm.

One more time, silently repeat the intention you set — three times.

Your intention has been planted within your heart.
It will grow with each breath you take.

When you feel ready, gently guide yourself to a seat to close this practice.